A healing programme to deal with TMS stuttering - Version 1.5 August 2017 © Peter Louw
Introduction
For general
TMS pain, various healing programmes have already been developed – some are
contained in books, such as Zero Pain Now, by Adam Heller, or Unlearn Your Pain, by Dr Howard Schubiner MD, and some
are found for free on the internet, such as the TMS Wiki Recovery Program. These programmes are, of course,
aimed at TMS pain rather than stuttering, so naturally if you wish to follow
these programmes you should, in your mind, replace the word "pain"
with "stutter" wherever you find it. Even so it seems logical to also
develop a dedicated TMS programme for people who stutter (PWS), so here goes –
and I will try to make this as short as possible.
Mindbody
healing for stuttering is aimed at changing our mindset about stuttering. We
have to start thinking differently
about stuttering, on a conscious as
well as subconscious level. This we
do by receiving new information about stuttering. Ultimately the information
received consciously should sink in to reach the subconscious, where true
healing occurs.
But … a
mindbody (aka psycho-physical) disorder has a mental as well as physical side.
The mind may cause the symptoms, but the symptoms are real and physical. Feedback I've received indicates that the
mindbody approach to stuttering works best when combined with a good fluency
technique – such as the Passive Airflow Technique (PAT) – to deal with the
physical side of stuttering. So if you're not making progress with mindbody
tools only, try combining them with the PAT or other fluency technique. In
section "E" below you will find more details on PAT.
A.
Preparatory phase ("knowledge therapy")
Get basic
information about TMS (tension myositis syndrome) and understand why and how it
causes stuttering. Note that you need to have an open mind
about stuttering, because at first sight the theory may seem far-fetched!
The TMS explanation needs to sink in deeply so
that it reaches the subconscious. YOU need to be convinced that the TMS explanation makes sense and that
many people have been helped by it. Without this belief, the subconscious will
continue to send symptoms. Much of the
healing happens on a subconscious level; and how will the subconscious be
convinced if you CONSCIOUSLY are not convinced?
Videos: Check out a few of the many Youtube videos by
or featuring Dr John Sarno MD, Dr Howard Schubiner MD, Dr David Schechter MD or
any other TMS practitioner.
Books: Try to read at least TWO books on TMS, so
that these ideas can begin to sink in. Check out THIS LIST OF TMS BOOKS.
Note that TMS
is an open-ended concept – many disorders not specifically mentioned in these
books may also be generated psychologically, just like TMS pain. So read these
books as if they are all about stuttering, not just pain.
But don't get
stuck in this reading phase forever – at some stage you will have to start
applying your newly acquired knowledge to your actual symptoms. If the books have convinced you that
TMS is indeed causing your stutter, it may be time to start doing the work. And
that means beginning to apply mindbody principles in real life to stuttering.
Here are a few:
B. Principles
to focus on
"Do not focus on the physical – focus on the
psychological."
TRY TO IGNORE THE ACTUAL STUTTER AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE.
Stuttering is only a SYMPTOM; the CAUSE is mostly repressed negative emotions such as anger / rage, fear, sadness or
else daily stress/tension (in any of its many forms). The more you focus on the
actual stutter, the longer it will take to overcome it. The reason for this is
that stuttering is a psychological defense mechanism, and its purpose is to
distract your conscious mind away from repressed negative emotion(s) and / or
thoughts that threaten to rise to the conscious surface. If you obsess over
stuttering, the subconscious receives the message that its defence is
successful, so that there is no reason to remove it. But when you ignore the
stutter, the subconscious gets the message that the stutter is ineffective.
This seems to "discourage" the subconscious defense system from
sending symptoms. Believe me, this strategy works! I know, it sounds weird …
but then the human mind is a strange and mysterious thing.
So do avoid
over-thinking or talking about stuttering itself, or its mechanics; rather
analyse the feelings behind the stutter. It is such a pity that so many
stuttering groups / organisations obsessively focus on the symptoms, thereby
actually aggravating the problem.
"Continuously identify, acknowledge and
accept the subconscious, repressed negative emotion(s) that cause
symptoms".
It
is not always easy to pinpoint these emotions, but very often they are
bottled-up and unaware RAGE / ANGER. FEAR, sadness, loneliness, shame /
embarrassment, guilt and regret are some other feelings often behind the
stutter. Some feelings, such as irritation and frustration, simpy
"hide" behind the "real" feeling which is anger / rage. Often
these emotions have been carried over subconsciously from childhood.
Sometimes,
however, the stutter is caused or made worse simply by day-to-day stresses due
to work, kids, relationships, family, health, bad news etc. Keep
in mind the bottom line, which is the fact that mind and body are interrelated,
and that the one affects the other.
"Perfectionism enrages the inner
child".
Stuttering
can be seen from two angles: (1) As a defensive mechanism, with the purpose of
distracting us from repressed, unacceptable emotions (2) As the
"voice" of the "inner child" (or, more accurately, your "younger self" who could be you at any previous age). What is the inner child, you
may ask. Well, the inner child can be seen as that part of the subconscious
which stores our experiences, attitudes and feelings of the time when we were
young.
This inner
child is not unlike a real child, but it's more than a child. It's also our
animal nature, our primitive side (in Freudian psychology it's called the
"id"). It seeks pleasure; it is dependent and intellectually lazy; it
is extremely selfish, emotionally immature and quick to anger. And it HATES two things: perfectionism, and goodism
(the tendency to be extremely "good", unselfish and self-sacrificing.
Actually, goodism is a form of perfectionism). Very often, mindbody symptoms
are caused by the inner child who is enraged because of the perfectionist and
goodist demands made on it by our mature self. Perfectionism and goodism may feed
a huge pool of repressed rage, thereby creating psychological tension which maintains
mindbody symptoms such as stuttering. So do avoid perfectionism and goodism!
"Develop an attitude of disdain toward the
stutter"
"I encourage patients to develop an
attitude of disdain toward the (stutter) to replace their strong feelings of
intimidation. This sends a message to the subconscious that the strategy of
keeping attention focused on the body is about to fail - which means the
cessation of (stuttering)." --- Dr John Sarno MD, in his book Healing Back Pain - The
Mind-Body Connection. (Quotation slightly changed to make
it relevant to stuttering.)
Note, however, that
some of the TMS people disagree with Dr. Sarno on this point. They say that
symptoms (pain, stuttering etc.) are the "cries" or "weeping"
of the inner child, and that this child should not be treated with disdain, but
rather comforted and loved. So do experiment with both of these approaches to
see which works best for you.
"Journalling":
Many people find it
helpful to WRITE about their stuttering; the problems it caused in the past as
well as the present; what makes your fluency worse or better etc. Try to focus on the social / psychological
reasons for the stutter, not the physical stuttering itself – because,
remember, stuttering is just a symptom. You can write in a diary, on a blog
etc. Consider actually writing a book; this could go a long way toward fluency
as the psychological benefits of discharging, expressing and sharing of emotions could be immense.
This is not
recommended for everybody, as journalling makes some people re-live traumatic
or otherwise upsetting experiences.
"Do not repress – express!"
Expressing yourself is the opposite
of repressing emotions. Use body language (gestures, facial expressions etc.)
and emotions to support your communication. Speak louder, vary your pitch.
Don't sound like a robot! Watch how movie or TV actors express themselves in
the roles they play, and learn from them.
Various well-known movie stars who
used to stutter have found that acting makes them fluent – because acting is
highly creative and expresses their deepest feelings. If you are by nature
introverted / inhibited, try to develop your extroverted side. And keep in mind
that shyness is NOT an inherited trait; shyness is learned and can be
unlearned. In the words of John Harrison, the well-known American self-help
expert on stuttering who conquered his stutter: "Do not hold back!"
MUSIC can
be a great help in getting in touch with and expressing emotions. Learning to
play a musical instrument would obviously be highly useful; but even just
LISTENING to music may stimulate your emotional side.
"Talk often to your subconscious."
Tell your subconscious that you are
"on to it" and its deception, that you refuse to be controlled by it
and that you will no longer be intimidated by the stutter. This sends a
powerful message to the subconscious that the tide has turned and that you are
in control.
Also, "talk" to your inner child
daily. Children tend to feel vulnerable, dependent and weak. Such feelings are
often repressed and subconsciously carried into adulthood, resulting in
physical symptoms. Tell your inner child that you are no longer the weak,
vulnerable child you may have been decades ago and that therefore there is no
more reason for anxiety. As an adult you know so much more – you are streetwise
and much stronger. This message has to sink in deeply into the
subconscious.
"Be assertive."
"Keep your anger close to you,
like a dog on a leash." This could be useful if repressed rage / anger is
causing your problems. It really means having an assertive yet
non-confrontational speaking style. Assertiveness, being a civilised, mild and
socially acceptable form of aggression, will reduce the huge pool of repressed
rage within the subconscious which may be feeding the stutter. Assertiveness,
however, is not equivalent to confidence – because confidence so often implies
that you are always right. Assertiveness means not being apologetic; it means
being aware of your rights as a human being – having the right to speak and
voice your opinion appropriately without disrespecting the rights of others. It
is a win-win approach whereas aggression is win-lose. For more information on
assertiveness, check out this short article in my
book.
"Visualise your success."
"Do not go it alone."
This is a well-tested principle in
stuttering treatment and also holds true for the psychotherapeutic approach to
stuttering. If you are serious to get the upper hand in stuttering, don't try
to walk this road alone. Stuttering is in many ways a social disorder – most
stuttering people don't stutter when alone – so it makes sense to enlist others
in your efforts. Discussing stuttering with others who stutter is extremely
therapeutic as it discharges tons of negative emotions which have accumulated
over the years and that have maintained high speech-linked stress / anxiety
levels. There are so many ways to do so:
Find
a "speech buddy" by means of one of the Facebook stuttering groups,
and share ideas, audioclips and videos with him / her regularly via Facebook,
Messenger, Google Hangouts, Skype etc.
Join
one of the Google Hangouts for people who stutter.
Join
a support / self-help group in your area for people who stutter. If such a
group does not exist in your area, consider creating one yourself.
Enlist
as many people as possible in your efforts – family members, friends,
colleagues. Discuss stuttering with them, explain it and let them know what you
are doing and how they can assist.
Stuttering children
Parents should ensure that a home
atmosphere is created which encourages the stuttering child to express himself
/ herself freely, instead of bottling up emotions such as rage or fear. If it
is true that repressed negative emotions lead to stuttering, it makes sense to
try and "unrepress" those emotions. Keep in mind that Highly
Sensitive Children (HSCs) may be prone to stuttering because of their sensitive
nature, and that research has found that most stuttering children ARE in fact
HSCs.
Example: An older twin sister, who is her younger brother's best friend,
tends to always get the first word in, thereby frustrating the brother. But
being sensitive he doesn't want to upset their friendship and doesn't express
his irritation, instead repressing it. Eventually, however, his irritation
turns to anger / rage, which is also repressed. In due course this repressed
anger / rage accumulates and may cause mindbody symptoms such as stuttering.
C. Speaking technique
Develop the
correct mindset before starting a conversation. Before speaking, ask yourself the "golden question":
"Right now, what emotion am I feeling?" If it is fear, rage,
embarrassment etc., fully accept and
acknowledge that feeling, instead of fighting it. Fighting it means
repressing it, which is the wrong way to handle it. Yes, it's not easy, and
fear may make you tremble, sweat etc. But the emotion will go away, while you
will still be there. Try to "ride out" the emotion and, if necessary,
use a fluency technique like "passive airflow", "slow / prolonged speech", "slowed first syllable / slow start / easy onset" etc. to get you speaking.
This
procedure, namely getting in touch with
your emotions before and during speaking, should eventually become easier
as it becomes a habit. Identifying and acknowledging the feeling before and
during speaking sends an extremely powerful signal to the subconscious defense
mechanism that it no longer needs to send symptoms, because you have
acknowledged the repressed emotion.
When you
do stutter, shift your attention to a possible psychological cause,
like something you are worried about, a chronic family or financial problem, a
recurrent source of irritation etc., for that sends a message to the brain that
you're no longer deceived by the stutter, says Dr Sarno. When that message
reaches the depths of the mind, the subconscious, the stutter is weakened.
D. The Daily Reminders
Take ten
minutes off every day and read the following Daily Reminders slowly, taking
time to consider them so that they sink deeply into your subconscious. Even
better, MEMORIZE them:
Some
people experience immediate fluency improvement after starting this programme.
For others it may be some weeks or months before there is a change. Keep in
mind that adults who stutter have been doing so for years or decades, so DO NOT
expect a quick miracle cure! Don't be impatient - psychological healing can
take time and effort.
